Toward a World that Works for Everyone
This morning I observed myself as I acted mechanically, below awareness, and aggressively. The situation was mundane. I’ve been allowing my waste paper pile to grow rather than shredding it as we go along. It’s reached sizable proportions and I’ve come to a shred-it-now-or-never point. I’m having a real but crazy argument with myself and […]
Seeing the script I have playing – and the discoveries that it’s leading to – is like an earthquake in my life. (1) And it’s led to numerous aftershocks. It’s opened the door for me to complete the cycle of domestic abuse that occurred in our household. It’s led to me see the identity I […]
Now that my parents’ two-handed card game of arrogance and depression is up to awareness, I’ve been observing how often it operates in me. The number of times I wince in a day is large and that wincing is me imitating my Mother’s reactions to my Dad. I hate the wincing. I feel like I’ve […]
I recently had a breakthrough in my cleansing process. Up till now I’d been processing singular vasanas (or core issues) as they erupted. (1) A few days back, something different presented itself. I felt awful and there was no reason that I could see why I might feel that way. So I began to observe. […]
I’ve been walking around triggering myself for a while now. And if I walk the trigger back, I find that I’m disappointed in myself (Mother). I’m disappointed because I reacted to some forgotten thought with irritation, anger, aggressiveness, or some negative attitude (Father). I have my Father and Mother endlessly arguing in my head. The […]
I’d like to make a distinction between objective fact and subjective interpretation. The worst I ever did was steal a chocolate bar. OK, a tin of rock candy too. For both of which I was caught and disciplined. That’s an objective fact. Apart from those cries for help (my father was hitting my mother), I […]
If I have it all already inside me, if all of this is a process of remembering, if the only obstacle is what I put in my own way, then come out! Come out! Whoever you are! I will stop blocking your way. I am no longer afraid of standing here as I am. I […]
Most people define their careers in terms of what exists. And they fit into a possibly well-defined career description. My first career – history – had not been well defined the two subfields – cultural history and evolutionary history – that I chose to specialize in at the time (1968-73). But to go further I […]
Wow, what a discipline it is not to fall off the wagon and resort to pushy, aggressive behaviour, however subtle. I may be in the black, on the uplift, but my behaviour patterns – the leftovers and last to go – are still suspicious, hostile, etc. Only so much time remains to cleanse and purify […]
One way I go from feeling power-less to affect the large world out there – which is in the process of waking up from the longest-imaginable sleep – to power-full is to remember that my absolutely most powerful position and best contribution is to change, to refashion, to transform myself. Never mind that I’m now […]
Before thinking about bringing peace to the world, we may need to bring peace to ourselves. This article is part of that process for me. I notice I’m not creating as much residue, as much debris in my wake as I used to. I’m still dropping a royal clanger every now and then, but not […]
I’ve reached the end of the road with an act of mine, a racket, a number. I’ve processed this number before. I’m processing it now at a much deeper level. Its presenting sign is that I wake up in the morning and I’m not cheerful. Nothing has happened that I be anything but cheerful, but […]
For me this seems like a time of strangeness, a time of weirdness. On the one hand, I feel determined in certain areas; on the other hand, I feel weak and vacillating in others. There was a cartoon in one of the leading magazines decades ago called “Top Dog/Underdog.” Inside was the outline of a […]
I have tremendous respect for the Arcturian Group, via Marilyn Raffaele. This week they knocked the ball out of the park – for me, that is. Half their message was on vasanas (or core issues) and the habitual reaction patterns they give rise to. The reason I’m so happy is that most spiritual sources make […]
I’m buoyed up to hear how much time Patricia Cota-Robles gave to purification because, for me, that yields the most welcome and beneficial results among things I can do while waiting for Godot. On the awareness path, what that waiting means is to watch and pay particular attention to things that are taking me in […]
