Because there are unresolved, ongoing security risks, this vasana, most likely, will not subside the way others have. One side of me wants it to subside. The other side is asking me to stay awake to it because of the risks involved. This is a matter of duty, it says. You need to stay alert now.
Another side of me says trust Michael. When my mistakes caused the blog serious trouble, I asked Michael where the protection was and he said that there were larger events afoot which this occurrence served. He told me what they were and I accepted it.
Now here too, I’m sure there are bigger events afoot and I haven’t actually been harmed. I did not miss a day’s work on my computer, having borrowed a MacBook Air from a friend in the interim.
This is an aside, when a major vasana like this goes off, I recommend that you try to preserve things as usual and normal as possible. Because something minor like not being able to find a pen at a time like this can cause an eruption in many people … OK, in me.
So, for instance, I grabbed an old shoulder bag and immediately populated it with as much of what I had as before. I was fortunate to work on a MacBook Air so the machine and software were familiar to me.
And I had total cooperation from everyone in my life. More than total cooperation and I thank everyone from the bottom of my heart.
***
Turning to the personal, in my view, we want to keep the environment as quiet and peaceful as possible for the one in the upset. An upset upsets a person’s calculations, routines, thinking, feeling. and it’s important to them that they have the needed time to sort things out.
Gosh, the words are just rolling out here. It’s important not to advise or counsel them at this time. Now hear this: They can’t hear you. They will not take their attention off the upset. If you insist, they may explode.
This probably will be happening all around us at some future date when people find out what some folks have been doing; need I name names? So we need to take the matter seriously and get clear on what we need to do and how to do it when we feel like we’re about to go insane.
On the practical front, I no longer carry needless identity cards and nothing else that I’d be afraid to lose in my shoulder bag. I’ll go back to a wallet or cardholder for those. My laptop does not leave my apartment.
My replacement shoulder bag has straps that I can tie around the front. Yesterday on the bus I was going to take it off and put it on the seat beside. The straps reminded me not to.
At some point I’ll turn my attention to my cellphone and reduce risk there as well.
You have to remember: My memory is not great, which is why I don’t do live interviews.
Added to that, I now see what Michael means by “interdimensional travelling.” I am in love and bliss a fair amount and I can “space” out, so to speak. My cognitive processes are not affected. But my memory becomes doubly unreliable then.
***
Next?
I’ll wait until I see evidence of identity fraud before reacting to that one. I don’t think Michael would permit that, no matter what larger purpose my initial loss may serve. So I don’t see that as a risk any more, having reasoned it through.
So do notice: We use any method or technique that will work to release the grip of our vasana. I’ve experienced parts of it through to completion. I’ve taken a stand on other parts. I’ve reasoned this one through. Whatever works.
At some point I may draw on all I learned from studying military history for so long. I may take command of myself and have myself snap out of it if things get critical.
All these years I’ve been trying to minimize and gentle out the military side of myself. But now I may choose to draw more and more on those skills – security, forethought, planning, logistics, disaster and contingency planning, etc.
Just as I ransack my hard drive for messages from the Mother to include in my next book (1), so I ransack my mind for processing techniques useful in a crisis.
The time to draw on unorthodox skills may just have arrived. I don’t want to regiment others. But I may need to take charge of myself given my memory difficulties.
“It had to be this way,” Q says. I need to take charge of myself now that I’ve been shown how easily things can be up-ended by the simple leaving of a bag at a bus stop.
***
My mind is full of competing agendas. Since I can’t attend to them all, I’ll either blow my circuits and multiply the impact of the vasana itself or put them all aside and do this. Where is my To Do List? Who moved my To Do List?
There are so many issues that this raises and raising issues in me for completion before the Reval is a leading suspect in identifying why this is happening, instead of Michael giving me a shove and letting me know I left my bag there. Or having another pedestrian notice.
I’m resolving a number of related vasanas as they arise – trust of Michael, willingness to call on the Galactic Federation to get my bag back, clarity on what skills I need to draw on when things get hectic and overwhelming. I’m being given a foretaste, I think, of what it’s going to be like.
I now draw on my own remembered skill set of taking a stand and making a declaration. I do this for myself. I’m letting you listen in. My stand and declaration is that I will not allow such a serous security breach to happen again.
Again, I’m using every means available to exit this vasana – save stuffing it down.
Even taking charge and command of it is me experiencing my choice and so is not suppression.
I’m experiencing it, expressing it, taking a stand around it, reasoning it through, any productive approach that will complete some aspect of the vasana without suppressing it.
***
Finally, I re-choose what I want my life to be about from here on.
I serve the Divine Mother.
“You know that you are serving my beloved Michael and I would like to suggest to you, Sweet One, not to distract you, but you are also serving me.” (2)
“Beloved child of light, you do my bidding and you have for eons.” (3)
Therefore why should I fear?
I really only want two things in life: that I be permitted (1) to serve the Mother and (2) to write. I derive my joy from those two things.
I have a duty to keep safe what has been entrusted to me. This is a worldly obligation, not a matter of spiritual practice per se. I have to be alert and awake and I need to do whatever assists me in that.
It means putting in reserve the desire to become more kind and gentle for the moment and taking charge of my life without becoming coarse. It had to happen sooner or later.
Knowing that I serve the Divine Mother, my faith is that there are larger events occurring that this event serves. Not the least of them might be the clarity I’ve gained as a result of it and the material it produced on processing a vasana in a crisis.
To resolve the issue once and for all, I give my shoulder bag and all its contents to the Divine Mother to use as she wishes. I surrender my concern for it as a possession as counterproductive to the work I’ve been given to do.
For the rest I remain more alert and awake than I normally would to compensate for my deficit in memory.
I feel as if I’m emerging from a thick fog.
So this is what it took to “put out the fire” when I created a critical security risk and personal loss in my life. It’s what it took to emerge from the state of extreme upset without harming anyone else.
I don’t fool myself that this may be the end of it, but I hope it is.
A revised copy of How to Handle a Number One Upset including later articles is attached.
Footnotes
(1) I have to do some something to keep the mind alive during a lockdown, with vaccinations being pushed, vaccine passports in force, etc. So I’m organizing my articles into books that may be useful or entertaining when the storm hits. In military terms, this is the provisioning of forward stations, attending to logistics, organizing myself for the storm. Hopefully you are too.
(2) Divine Mother in a personal reading with Steve Beckow through Linda Dillon, Oct. 26, 2018.
(3) Divine Mother, ibid., June 7, 2015.
Download a copy of How to Process a Number One Upset here: https://goldenageofgaia.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/How-to-Process-a-Number-One-Upset-R13.pdf.