I’m a workaholic by nature, an impatient Type A.
Archangel Michael once confessed to me that he gave me MSSA when I was in the hospital in 2018 to keep me horizontal for another week. (1)
I love to work. I love to reach a certain energy level, often when my fingers are flying. I’m happy, zinging along, even … well, what I thought of as joyful.
Some people call that “the zone.” Others “doing what you love.” “Following your bliss.” Etc.
Some call it stream of consciousness. It might better be called stream of inspiration. (2)
***
Joy is not the same as the feelings of satisfaction I get from working away, “in the flow,” for a period of time. As I am right now.
In my books, joy means stop work, relax, and be happy. This is quite foreign to me. Even if I were to stop work, I’d work.
A reformed troll under the bridge who recently abandoned negativity and chose positivity, I still find joy a bridge too far. I’m not sure why. I’ll take a look.
Certainly the Mother explains that the journey home to God was meant to be joyful. So being joyful is in line with the Plan. She says:
Divine Mother: [Your interpretation of the purpose of life] is correct, but, as your Mother, I also say to you, dearest heart, lighten up and play.
So, yes, it is designed this way, that there are many, an infinite number of faces to Source. You see, when human beings, my sweet children, say they are seeking God and God is seeking them and there is a point of full conjunction, there is a sense of work about it. But part of the design is the delight of it.
It is the delight of so many expressions of beauty, of might, of strength, of patience, of humility. It is the hilarity and, yes, it is also the intensity. So it is not just the direct, what you think of as, work to reunite. It is the journey of joy. That is why Michael and and all of my Legions are so continually emphatic about claiming the joy.
It is not intended to be a journey of hardship, of being maligned and feeling burdened. Those burdens, that heaviness (which I of course do not deny are very present), are human creations. The design is for each being, whether it is a snail or a flower or a human, to be the joy. (3)
That is so hard for me to hear. But I’m not trying to win anyone to my point of view. (4) There’s obviously more work for the reformed troll to do.
I push my edge and allow joy to at least accompany me on my wanderings. It certainly has the ability to make everything lighter and more fun.
Then I hear: “Me joyful? Bah, humbug, lad. That’ll be the day.”
As it spoke, I flashed on myself at a window, watching the traffic pass by.
It was business as usual this morning. Nothing stopped, the day my Mother died, but me.
So that’s the source of this vasana. (5). It seems as if I’ve had no experience of joy in my life since that day. (6)
Footnotes
(1) Steve: Did you bring on the onset of MSSA to have me relax and just spend some time in the hospital?
Archangel Michael: Yes.
Steve: I thought you did! Oh, boy. That is so funny!
AAM: There is a part of you, even when we suggested to you that timeout was required, that doesn’t know what that means. (Archangel Michael in a personal reading with Steve Beckow through Linda Dillon, Nov. 26, 2019.) (Hereafter AAM.)
(2) Michael acknowledges the co-creative aspect of it:
Archangel Michael: Know that I am right next to you. Sometimes I am typing, sometimes I am moving your pen, always I am whispering in your ear. (AAM, Nov. 21, 2012.)
If it were as he says it is, I’d be honored beyond words.
(3) “Divine Mother: Know God but Through Joy,” November 4, 2018 (Oct. 26, 2018.) at https://goldenageofgaia.com/2018/11/04/divine-mother-know-god-but-through-joy/.
I’m at last ready to consider being joyful.
(4) As I said earlier, I don’t like the way I feel when I’m thinking that way and I’m resolved to do something about it. See “A Simple Resolve to Ground Our Work In,”
(5) See Vasanas: Preparing For Ascension by Clearing Old Issues at https://goldenageofgaia.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Vasanas-Preparing-for-Ascension-R16.pdf
(6) How like my Father that makes me. His childhood was joyless. My life was joyless after my Mother died.