From 2013.

I’m coming across nuggets while compiling Ascension and the Golden Age.

Download free here:

https://goldenageofgaia.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/Ascension-and-the-Golden-Age-2.pdf

Here’s one which relates an experience of a huge power surge that lasted a half hour, but energized my remaining negative vasanas and magnified them so much that I could see, beyond the shadow of a doubt, where they all led.

I’ve actually had the experience of a power surge three times. On another occasion than this one, the face of my ego came through, which my wife said scared her to death.  I saw it from inside. The ego was red, fearsome, and horned. It scared the life out of me as well. It came through like a volcanic eruption and then disappeared.

“Sometimes a Rude Shock Can be a Good thing,” at https://goldenageofgaia.com/2013/02/sometimes-a-rude-shock-can-be-a-good-thing/

It isn’t often that experiences happen right in the midst of things. Usually we go to a meditation retreat or a growth workshop and something happens in the course of it.

But yesterday I had an experience in the middle of the day. Nothing was happening prior and nothing happened after. It lasted for a half hour and then it was gone.

However it was life-altering and a glimpse into another realm.

Describing it will be difficult but here goes. For half an hour, I felt myself with more power coming through me and passing outwards than I could possibly imagine. I became for a time a person who … well, may as well have sprung into the physique of the Hulk, I had so much energy, so much power, so much drive passing through me.

Here I was, a human dynamo and the minute I allowed this energy to flow a millimeter in any direction, it passed through the filter of my human personality and I received a rude shock.

If someone poured a cup of mud into a bowl of punch, would I drink the punch? If someone dropped a piece of soap into my Coke, would I drink the Coke?

By the same token, the pure power passing through the filter of my personality did not emerge pure. It emerged tainted by my remaining vasanas, tainted by feelings that were ten times more powerful than when I felt them ordinarily.

The worst sides of me, which until now were completely hidden from me, were tremendously exaggerated, laid plain to sight, incapable of being misinterpreted. There is nothing hid that shall not be known, Jesus said. I now see one of the mechanisms whereby this self-revelation is done.

I didn’t like what I saw. I considered myself somewhat, maybe a tad further down the road than that, but what I saw emerging from that filter was below my standards of good behavior. At the same time it was so magnified and exaggerated that I was enabled to see it and denied any wiggle room. I did look at it and then asked the powers that be to close the experience off.

I reached the conclusion very quickly that I’m not capable at this moment of making good use of that much power. If I had that much right now and tried to interact with it, I’d probably end up perpetrating. I couldn’t remain balanced. I wouldn’t be fast enough to stop myself from misusing it.

I’d cause more mischief than good at this point in my development. If the situation were otherwise, I’d say so.

***

I thank the powers that be that took that experience away from me. I thank them as well for granting it to me for a brief period of time. It was enough to show me what real power was and how it can be abused.

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice got to wear the hat and watch the brooms go wild. One has to be able to handle that much juice and I’ve quite happily seen that, just like the Sorcerer’s Apprentice, I’m not able.

It cured me of wanting full interdimensional restoration at this moment. I wouldn’t yet know how to make good use of it.

It cured me of wanting to be fully opened, on a sudden path, rather than a gradual one.

It was like Bruce Almighty being God for a day, while God took a vacation. Thank you. I got it. Now here’s your hat back.

I feel absolutely reconciled to the gradual. Fully opened to the need to go no faster than the advisable pace. Fully understanding what can result otherwise.

I was glad that I didn’t have to walk such an advanced path. I had no further complaints and got back to work without grousing.

There’s an extreme point beyond which it isn’t prudent for me to go just yet. On balance and in retrospect, and no matter how much I’m criticized for it, I’m happy to leave the pace to you, Lord.