I used to call myself the Humpty Dumpty man
There are so many people reporting that major vasanas and core issues are coming up at this time and some of the stories are heart-wrenching.
They’re coming up to be cleared.
Here are some noticeings that I wanted to share about this process.
On this side of the truth of a vasana being seen, a person can feel tired, exhausted, etc. Once the vasana is seen and recognized, the same person may feel totally energized, awake, aware. The truth has set us free and there’s no more concrete demonstration of it than this time of occurrence.
We usually think that fatigue is physical, but not always or even often. It’s always a surprise to see that, under the vasana, we have all the energy in the world. The vasana caps our energy.
Werner Erhard used to say that, if we put the truth in the place where the truth already is, the unwanted condition disappears. So there’s an unwanted condition and that’s the truth. And when we recognize the truth of that unwanted condition, the condition lifts.
The corollary of that is that we can use the truth to guide us in our process. If we’re realizing more and more truth, we should be experiencing more and more release. If we’re not, then we haven’t yet hit upon the truth. Time to keep going.
The other day, faced with an unwanted condition, I kept asking my mind to share with me what that situation related to. And when the image came, right away I felt release from the situation.
Now here’s a more elaborate example, a realization that really knocked me over. I dissociated when my father yelled at me up close and in my face, when I was around ten. And I realized I was dissociated when I was 42 when a girlfriend said to me “Do you realize you have the profile of an abused child?”
Both sides of me – the public and the private – came up at once and said “Yes.” When they saw each other, both said: “Who are you?”
When they saw each other, I exploded and remained explosive for around three weeks. Now I was aware of the dissociation but still dissociated.
I didn’t put Humpty Dumpty together again until age 57, with the help of my therapist brother.
My dissociation showed up as a feeling that I had no solid ground beneath my feet, no confidence, no self-assurance. Push on me and I might fall over – psychologically. I also knew karate so that wasn’t true physically. Just psychologically.
But the point of mentioning it – and this is what I saw in the flash of recognition – is that there was one circumstances that had me come back together again temporarily. I would temporarily fuse when I became angry.
And I loved my anger because it allowed me to fuse for a time. I felt confident. I talked straight. I was decisive. It had all kinds of benefits. And I had forgotten that until this moment.
The disbenefit was that it wasn’t the kind of trait that wins friends and influences people – except to run away from me, shrieking, so to speak.
And when I saw the truth of that situation, it set me free as well. I felt lighter. Life looked brighter and so on.
If one is obliged to deal with a horrendous situation that reveals itself at this time of heightened energies, the tendency is to think that we’re saddled with an extra burden.
Not necessarily. What was horrendous can now become a means of contributing to the world. Lemons into lemonade, again. We’re all going through a massive clearing and sharing about what happened to us, what resulted from it, and what we now recognize can be of tremendous help to others.
There are so many subjects that are taboo for us. And the cabal exploited that by ridiculing anyone who brought up the truth of a subject they didn’t want revealed – extraterrestrials is an obvious example. But there are many other areas of life that have been warped and skewed to keep us from being healthy, exploring and discussing them. We need to free ourselves from the processes that dumbed us down, penned us in, and served as blinkers on us.
I can tell you that I feel tremendously limbered up from what I’ve been processing and of course I share it. Do I do this because I somehow want to thump my chest or say what a good boy am I? No, if I were into vanity and image-management, I think I wouldn’t share what I’m sharing. I’m into health and healing and sharing is a way to heal.
So … time for us to come out of the closet. Time to begin to mention the unmentionable. Time to claim back our freedom to be whole and complete.
And what better way than to surf the Tsunami of Love? The wedding’s been announced, the doors of the banquet hall are open, and we’re the honored guests. Our lamps are full and the Company of Heaven is playing the music. Saying “No!” to the marriage is an option but not the wisest one. The only real question for me is how wide do I open my arms and say “Yes!”