Someone needs to read this. Just channeled from the Universe:
Here’s a radical next level of self-love: don’t love yourself unless you truly desire being the one who loves you the way you’ve never been loved before.
You certainly don’t have to be good at it. That comes with time through the commitment of practice. All that is required is a pure willingness to give yourself the unwavering support you wholeheartedly crave, whether you think you are doing it right, wrong, or eliciting a mixed bag of results.
I say this, because your inner child, which is an aspect of your infinitely-expanding consciousness, knows the difference between being loved authentically and trying to be loved as your attempt to change circumstances.
Each time loving yourself contains an agenda, fixation, or attachment to outcome, your inner child feels ‘worked on’, receiving a message of judgment and rejection, which deepens the belief that it isn’t perfect, whole, and complete as it is. This does more to divide you from yourself, rather than unite all parts of self through the unconditionally-inclusive gesture of loving-kindness it yearns to so authentically feel.
If you are attempting to love yourself, as conceptually or mechanically as you would put together pieces of a table — please don’t.
Instead, you are far better served finding the bravery to face your feelings directly and honestly. Such a depth of bravery to openly face and make peace with yourself only occurs through a willingness to feel. It is important to remember, nothing you feel is ever evidence of you resisting the process. That’s just a form of trauma shaming that spiritual egos project onto each other when anything they do to control someone else’s emotional state doesn’t produce specific results.
Especially because, anyone who willfully resists can only succeed at avoidance, which means you are consciously choosing to be unaware of what you know is under the surface awaiting your attention.
This is a form of denial. You are not denying, resisting, or avoiding. You are feeling discomfort and displacement to such a painful awkward degree that you are likely to believe you are doing it wrong or imagining deeper feelings you must be bypassing when it doesn’t create the outcome you thought would occur.
With no need to project resistance onto unpopular emotional experiences or imagine there must be invisible skeletons in a closet you’ve already cleaned out a million times, you inch closer and closer to the threshold of resignation. This is where you desperately admit to yourself, “I don’t how to do this, I don’t know how to do any of it, and the last thing I need is to pretend I’m capable of something I’m most likely using in attempt to get my way.”
In this moment of triumphant existential defeat, something meaningful can open. It may even inspire you to say to your inner child, “I wish I knew how to love you authentically. Please teach me how to love you. I’m ready to be guided.”
Such sincerity has the power to bring all your hurtful parts together, instead of shallowly projecting a concept of love while hoping for a spontaneously obedient response.
Yes, in the beginning, loving yourself can be frustrating, confusing, and even overwhelming. And yet, it’s not actually loving yourself that causes such overwhelm, confusion, and frustration, but the agenda and attachment to outcome within each attempt.
This is why, with less and less attachment to outcome, you are far better off asking your inner child for help, instead of acting like another person who pretends to have it all together.
You saw through that facade in adults when you were younger, which is what gives your inner child the awareness and capacity to ultimately see through you, whenever self-love is used as a form of control versus a means of authentic connection.
All For Love,