Pandemic, lockdown, race riots, political wars, on and on. More and more I feel thrown back on my own resources, isolated, out of contact with people.
And now I’m choosing to go out of touch with those last few boots on the ground I relied on to give me a modicum of hopefully-unbiased news.
Even they are polarized and shouting about this and that group. Sen Joe McCarthy would have felt at home in the current environment. Adolf Hitler would be exploiting it.
To say that my heart isn’t into it is an understatement.
So, thrust back on my own resources in what looks like outer chaos, (1) I saw that I needed to make one important change in my life to keep my sanity and get through this period. This was the perfect time to do it.
I could no longer support having a life compartmentalized into spiritual, work, and everyday life. I had to make them one and the same. I had to have congruence in my life. I had to integrate everything I knew about myself to shake the cobwebs off of me.
Speaking only for me, I have “streamers,” to use Matthew’s word, inside of me that are prone to conflict, divisiveness, arguing. If I go on compartmentalizing, I leave the door open to perpetual conflict from the divided and self-serving egoic mind. I want to do this; no, I want to do that, all of this happening below everyday awareness and never being spoken about.
There has to be no difference between my spiritual, work, and everyday life.
From this vantage point that looks like a huge undertaking – my personal D-Day.
Immediately the demands of one collide with the requirements of another. The bargaining begins, the bottlenecks arise, and the possibility of conflict ensues.
But the bridge has to be crossed and the sooner I do it, the better.
I have to make my spiritual, work, and everyday life one.
(1) I’m aware that what I propose addresses my inner chaos. As within, so without.