On the awareness path, we discuss what’s right there in front of our eyes. What’s going on for me right now? How am I feeling? What am I focusing on?
Notice that this isn’t the ethic followed by show biz or politics or the media. Their ethics concern things like putting on your best face, talking it up, putting a good spin on things, etc.
That leads to a constructed self which is the very thing you and I have been climbing out of for the last three to twenty years.
So if I were to say what’s actually happening for me right now, I’d say things which people “should not” say. This won’t earn me a medal. It won’t help my credit rating or push my stocks up.
But it allows me to be transparent and that, in turn, allows me not to have to remember things or “get my story straight,” etc. I’m free of the past and can remain in the center.
So what’s the truth for me right now?
The truth is I’m about as stressed as I could possibly imagine myself to be. This is why.
This morning I assisted in what will eventually be the movement of large sums of money (yes, AAM wants me to discuss financial matters in general terms if it’s directly relevant to the awareness topic at hand. There’s no avoiding it for someone in my line of work. But I’ll be circumspect).
Moreover, the set of transactions was conducted among people for whom English was a second language and so there was some confusion over terminology, etc. And mistakes were made.
There was also uncertainty about whether someone can carry valuable assets from one country to another without having them confiscated or being thrown in jail.
And finally no one involved has two cents to rub together until after the assets are monetized. So no one knows how all this will be financed before the fact. After the fact, yes. Before, no. Thinking about the possible expense involved in completing these transactions is yet another stressor and can be misconstrued as resistance to the common endeavor.
After three hours of managing this discussion, I went back to bed.
I’m citing this as an example of the transactions up ahead which will challenge us probably more than anything has previously. There’s much risk, much expense, and much anxiety.
I apply my awareness to it. I notice that, when I’m that stressed, I take a few evolutionary steps backwards.
I become whiney, gripey, impatient. I don’t listen well. I develop an edge. I just want “Go/No Go” decisions, never mind the explanations.
Why would AAM want someone like me involved in these matters when… and on and on my mind goes.
What to do? These responsibilities will only grow by orders of magnitude when it’s our turn to exchange. And after that, when we build several organizations at once, again Stress City.
What’s the answer?
I discover that the answer is the same as it has been since mid-March: Breathe up transformative love and send that love out. Love up; love out. Love up; love out.
As soon as love begins to course through me, the stress is instantly gone. The two cannot abide in the same space.
Saul and Jesus have been saying that love is the answer to all problems for years and I agree with them. I know intellectually that love is the answer to everything. But I don’t know it as realized knowledge or realization.
I get to experience my love as it passes through me and out into the world. It’s at that moment that stress disappears.
Did I know that stress would disappear before I took these steps? No, I did not.
Will there be anybody around to remind me to breathe up love if I feel stressed. Probably not.
So I need to find a way to remind myself.
I take the stand: “Love First.” That puts the matter front and center and records for me what I’ve decided to do as soon as stress hits.
I won’t be able to escape stress but I can disperse it with love.
(I’ll be looking at several other ways to relieve stress, on Sunday.)