… there is no I in love ….
(Continued from Part 1.)
Reprinted from May 2015.
I’d like to continue looking at the feeling-level experience of love that I was immersed in the other day.
The space of love and bliss seemed unshakeable. I noticed that, while in it, I made choices, but without preferences. I was in what Sosan and Krishnamurti called choiceless awareness. Just being here with nothing added. Acting without acting. Remaining centered. Doing what worked and whatever I did worked.
I saw then, a little more strongly than I do now – since I’m not in that space any longer – that I’m entirely a form made by love from itself, immersed in a sea of love.
I saw all traces of “I want” (ego and desire) disappear.
The fact that I had no preferences was very important. Preferences are not bad but they take us away from our center point, the stillpoint, the heart.
Away from the heart is another way of saying away from love. Going away from the heart is what Jesus called distraction:
“Come back to what is important. And that is, you are love. It is all you have ever been. Everything else — everything else, every other lifetime — is just a distraction.” (1)
We distract ourselves endlessly from the love that we are and that’s present in our very own hearts. And then we wonder why we feel so low or down or awful.
Preferences end up being a distraction from love, from our natural state. The only reason there isn’t a hue and cry raised and a global campaign started to restore love to all our lives is that so few of us have experienced transformational love. Hardly any of us know it exists. We know romantic love does but that’s the merest shadow of this other.
I’ve experienced transformational love around two dozen times in spiritual experiences prior to this latest, extended round in 2015 [March 13 – Sept. 28, 2015]. But these earlier years covered mere minutes a year. And then the memory faded away and I was back to normal again.
And this would be after weeks, months and years of intense work in workshops and retreats. The real kicker is that each of these experiences actually did repay years of spiritual work. Each was so memorable.
I noticed the other day, as I flirted with my preferences, that it caused me to withdraw from the space of love. I could have kept going with the experiment but I probably would have found myself entirely out of the experience of love and back in lower vibrations again.
Viewed from another angle, love is the only thing we can desire that’s free. Everything else carries a karmic price tag.
Basically we have to eliminate every form of tie that keeps us in the lower vibrations – preferences, strong desires, attachments and addictions. We have to remain in our centers. Not like I’m so great at this. I’m not. But I’m getting better.
When we cut all preferences, we remain in the heart and exist in our natural, native state – which is love.
Sahaja samadhi, which this was not, is our “natural state.” I take it this time spent in bliss was just a nibble of it, a hint, a gift of the angels.
I remained in the loving state as I went about my errands in Vancouver. Everything was different. Every interaction worked. If the whole world felt this way and lived it, the world would instantly work. This is what it will take – transformational love and bliss – to make the world work.
Footnotes
(1) “Jesus: You are Love. It is All You Have Ever Been,” channeled by Linda Dillon, December 18, 2013, at https://goldenageofgaia.com/2013/12/jesus-you-are-love-it-is-all-you-have-ever-been/.