The re-entry from desirelessness to everyday consciousness continues. This re-entry is unusually hard.
Re-entry is like a stairstep operation. One seems to go down by bumps. Usually from one day to the next.
In this latest stairstep, I was smitten with numerous desires. I was grumpy, positional, depressed. I was easily overwhelmed and really only wanted to sleep.
(I’m also told the Schumann Resonance is off the scale and Vancouver is in the midst of a heat wave. It’s 91° out.)
Any loss of consciousness upon re-entry after a spiritual experience is lamentable, but inevitable until Ascension.
One re-entry long ago happened so fast that I had to leave work and go home to recover from the recovery. But most transitions back to everyday consciousness are not pile drivers as this one is proving to be.
I really liked desirelessness. I want more of that. So add desirelessness to the list of divine states I’m now hungering after.
Yes, I’m desiring desirelessness, but remember what Krishna said: Divinity is all that a person may desire without violating the law of their nature. (1) You say the game is rigged? I guess it is. It’s rigged in favor of love/light/God.
I’m not sure whether the pendulum is swinging back and this grumpiness and weariness are extremes or whether this is it for me for the next while.
This can’t be the balance point. It flies in the face of everything I’ve learned and been through.
I guess I should use my newfound knowledge then: I know that the point at which I have the maximum leverage is the point at which I attach to the desire.
I can’t stop the desire any more than I can stop an itch or a hiccup. But I can decline to attach to any desire. That’s the extent of my control, without getting into suppression and repression. Over time my response will come from a different place than the desiring mind.
Let me then spend my time with my pruning shears, cutting the vines of desire. Let Lao-Tzu be my guide in this:
“Touch ultimate emptiness,
Hold steady and still.” (2)
“Let this monkey go.
The Way is gained by daily loss,
Loss upon loss until
At last comes rest. ” (3)
And, look. I’ve just found a second arrow in my quiver. I can bring love up from my heart and circulate it around me. I repeat what Michael said yesterday:
“Love is the energy of the universe. It is the energy of the Mother. And it moves constantly, continually, eternally, infinitely. So, to have an experience of love, it [must move] through you. Now, does it fill you? Does it restore you? Does it nourish you? Does it alter you? Does it change you? Does it give you that evolutionary jump? Yes. It nourishes you, but it also clears you out. In some ways, it will purge many of your remaining illusions.” (4)
Hold the pharmaceuticals. I’ll rely on love. Detach from desires and love yourself. Here I go.
(1) “I am all that a man may desire
The law of his nature.”
(Sri Krishna in Swami Prabhavananda and Christopher Isherwood, trans., Bhagavad-Gita. The Song of God. New York and , 71.
(2) Lao-Tzu, The Way of Life (Tao Te Ching). Trans. R.B. Blakney. New York and Scarborough:
New American Library, 1955, 16, 68.
(3) Ibid., 101. St. John of the Cross put the matter this way:
“To undertake the journey to God the heart must be burned and purified of all creatures [all created things, desires] with the fire of divine love.” (St. John of the Cross in Kieran Kavanaugh and Otilio Rodriguez, trans. Complete Works of St. John of the Cross. Washington: Institute of Carmelite Studies, 1973, 75.)
“Until a man is purged of his attachments he will not be equipped to possess God, neither here below through the pure transformation of love, nor in heaven through the beatific vision.” (St. John of the Cross, ibid., 78.)
(4) “Archangel Michael: Go with the Ebb and the Flow of Love,” channeled by Linda Dillon, April 3, 2014, at https://goldenageofgaia.com/2014/04/05/archangel-michael-go-with-the-ebb-and-the-flow-of-love/.