Credit: Holy Spirit Lutheran Church
I’m going to have to switch to awareness writing for this next topic. In-the-moment, stream of consciousness, go with the flow awareness.
My radar (my awareness) picked up that something was wrong with me this morning.
I would have thought I’d be finished with clearing for a while after dropping my character armor, (1) but the process continues.
The outer is assuming less and less significance or importance, all things considered. Hindus call this development “detachment.”
And it’s also been quiet for a week (people are away) so that I’ve had time just to be in what amounts to a walking meditation.
And my radar picked up this morning that there was cognitive dissonance inside me. I looked and I saw that I have this vague recollection that life does not need to be the way I’m living it.
I could vaguely recollect a time when the emotions were not running wild, up and down. An inner voice said: “It doesn’t have to be this way.”
And so I looked further and started to see the way I have things rigged up, my internal wiring.
When my mood and desire line up, I, playing the role of the ego, go along with the desire and am happy and quiet. For instance, I arrived back at my desk from preparing my morning coffee to find that I had gotten some honey on my hand.
The desire arose to go back to the kitchen and wash it off. The ego doesn’t want sticky honey on its hands and so we were both in agreement. I leapt up out of my chair and happily returned to the kitchen. Ego and desire (I want) lined up.
But when my will to do something is not there or doesn’t line up with a desire, then I’m grumpy, unwilling, complaining. And it’s at that moment that my life shows up for me as wrong, “out” in some way, not working.
“It doesn’t have to be this way.” I remember a time when … I’m having a realization … the ideas are shooting past me faster than I can take down …
I’m going to allow that to be because my job is to prefer writing to going with it, to visit, not stay, and report back. Both Michael and the Lord Arcturus have asked that of me. (2)
In the present, I remember a time when I felt equanimous, peaceful, detached from everything. The process of remembering is one of the ways that something is brought to my awareness. I can stumble on it. Someone can tell me. Or I can remember.
Any awareness of a higher state invites it to expand within us, to be experienced more fully if only briefly. If we respond with interest, it remains and grows. If we realize the true significance of what is happening – that we are being given a glimpse into the higher dimensions – it explodes.
We call that a realization. We’re simply seeing from a higher-dimensional perspective, for a moment. And then trying to relate what we learned when back in the density of the 3rd/4th Dimension.
As an aside, how does one describe higher-dimensional love, without describing its impact on us? I mean the nature or essence of love. No metaphors, please. It’s impossible. There are no words for it.
A realization is only a realization when we come back to this level. But at that level it’s just life, awareness.
And it’s that “life” that I’m remembering, that is being brought back into my awareness. Thank you, Michael.
But not just awareness as in, I’m aware of turning off the stove elements. But awareness as in what Werner Erhard called “conscious awareness,” versus our everyday, unconscious awareness.
The latter state is fertile ground for disagreements between desires and the will. And then my life sucks. The former state is one of flexibility, preference rather than attachment – and love.
If we greet the desire that has arisen with consent, our day goes well. If we resist the desire (with our will) the day sucks. It’s like having an argument with your partner and nothing goes well after that.
What is different about this day from any other was I remembered a time when things were not this way. No more than that. Just pure memory. A flash, which perfectly illustrated what the inner voice said, that “it doesn’t have to be this way.” Yes, I see what you mean.
Not accompanied by bliss. (Most realizations are just simple thoughts while we’re at a higher, blissful dimension.) And releasing a blizzard of thoughts I couldn’t possibly get down or retain.
BUT it’s like a grappling hook on a railing. It’s like a foothold, a base of operations from which to expand out.
It doesn’t have to be this way. It doesn’t have to be this way. Let go, let go, let go….
Footnotes
(1) On dropping my character armor, see Factory Reset; or, Dropping Our Character Armor at https://goldenageofgaia.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/06/Factory-Reset-or-Dropping-Our-Character-Armor-R8.pdf
(2) Archangel Michael: On the list of things to do, let [writing] always be the last thing that falls off. (Archangel Michael in a personal reading with Steve Beckow through Linda Dillon, Feb. 7, 2013.) (Hereafter AAM.)
Archangel Michael: You are the communicator of clarity. So in all of this, [communicate] your words, your messages, your articles, your experiences and understandings. This is your number one job. (AAM, March 3, 2011.)
AAM: I beg of you, do not assume that when you write of what you are calling “the inner work,” that this does not have profound effect because the focus of the leadership movement, right now is on the inner work. (AAM, June 7, 2015.)
AAM: There is much to be said for Everyman, and that is part of the role you play. Yes, you are a pillar. You are an anchor. You’re an informant [monitor] but you’re also playing the role of Everyman – with curiosity, with exploration, with insight. So our desire is not to separate you from the collective. Let go of that fear. (AAM, Nov. 11, 2015.)
Lord Arcturus: Now, you have come to a planet in this and in other lifetimes to assist – yes, through communication, through clarity – with the progression of the planet through the elimination of the old Third, which was really quite disastrous, [to] the progression up through the Fifth, through the Sixth, to the Seventh so that the planetary system will reside in a level of higher consciousness, Christed consciousness as you think of it.
Now in order to do that, it is highly beneficial – and this is where mutuality [i.e., our working together] comes in – that you would have, not only the intelligence but the perspective of the higher dimensions (it is not a hierarchy but it is different). …
Because it is very important that humanity realize, as they are in their unfoldment to a grander plan, that the Seventh Dimension is not the end of the road, not the be all and end all.
And so, [you having] some of the perspective, the experience, the knowing, the intelligence of different dimensionality is highly beneficial in helping them move into that higher-dimensional anchoring. (Lord Arcturus in a personal reading with Steve Beckow through Linda Dillon, June 12, 2019.)