From hell to breakfast….
My last time repeating this:
My mission is to go up along with everybody else and write about it. My model is Everyman. My intended reach is global.
My brand of writing is usually characterized as “awareness writing,” sometimes as “ethnography,” and sometimes as “stream of consciousness.”
I feel a great urgency to get down whatever details I can about the experience that just happened to me.
I don’t think you’ll find it in the classical enlightenment texts. Usually a person breaks through on a single issue; picture an encounter group.
But to have the entire system we’ve developed to protect ourselves from harm drop away, I’ve never heard of it. (1)
And the supreme joke which, if I were a buddha, I’d be laughing myself silly about is:
How did I feel when I emerged? Blissful? No.
Ecstastic? No.
Then how?
Normal.
OMG.
***
When have we ever emerged from our entire character armoring? All the games we play, strategies, defense mechanisms, on and on just dropped from me.
But now the human race has done it once. Watch for others to do the same, now that the possibility has been broached.
It really was, on an astral level perhaps, like the dropping of a suit of armor.
And I emerged, restored to normality. Which means, from seven years old till now, I haven’t been responding to things in the range considered normal in our society.
In what I want to accomplish – which is to bring back the theorems and postulates of the Growth Movement – I take what I just said as feedback.
I haven’t been normal.
Well, of course not. I used to call myself the Troll under the bridge. My older brother Paul gave me a T-shirt with “Grumpy Old Fart” on it. Of course I’ve lived outside the range thought of as “normal.”
So here I am reporting to you that there is a frequency of emergence that may or will have you drop the entire kit-and-caboodle. The suit of armor. That which you think of as “you.” (It’s not.)
***
I feel like a jellyfish. I have no defense mechanism up. I feel no core issue (or vasana) go off. It’s like a factory reset.
It’s like my experience of innocence and purity at Xenia on Sept. 18, 2018. I feel innocent and pure. (2)
However, to report the latest, my memory does attempt to bring up one negative thought after another. But there’s no one listening. Nonetheless, it does give me my first fear: That my negative mind will drag me back down.
I’ll need to go down anyways. I’m in the afterglow now and I’ve asked everyone I know to allow me to isolate myself till this passes.
***
When this initially happened – probably at some time after April 9 when I slept and slept – I didn’t know what had occurred.
I don’t know of any enlightenment experience or emergence that comes with an instruction manual, map, and T-shirt. I never know where I am. I ask Michael.
So I don’t know what just happened. And then someone inspired the thought in me that I had dropped my character armor, completely, gone. And that resonated. (Michael may have also signalled “yes.” I can’t recall.)
Oh, my gosh, now I recall another piece.
We’re not to use the law of elimination except under special circumstances.
A short while ago, I invoked the law of elimination and the Divine Mother, Archangel Michael and Sanat Kumara, to take away all my negativity, every last bit of it.
I forgot about that. Screaming at heaven for more reach, more range. My friend being away from Vancouver for a month. Isolation. Five days (4 1/2) of fasting and sleeping.
Michael engineers moments like these. I’ve seen him do it. (3)
So I feel normal. I can still get frustrated, mad, impatient. It’s not that I’m somehow “beyond that.”
It’s more as if I’ve been given a fresh start.
And it’s also that things I couldn’t imagine myself doing, I can now do. Or imagine myself doing.
Live by the divine qualities? Of course. No question. Love others? I the hermit is at least up for it. But in limited qualities so that it doesn’t interfere with my writing.
One last thing. I just finished shouting at heaven that I needed enhanced psychic abilities because I’m tired of wasting time looking for lost objects on the Third Dimension.
… You never know!
Footnotes
(1) Remember I had arthritis in my right knee and then, in what seemed like a nocturnal heart attack, the arthritis was taken away? So I’m used to “heroic” interventions.
(2) I finally reached what resembled a tunnel and at the end of it was the Light of the Self. And in the presence of the Self I felt innocent and pure.
I had penetrated through the hridayam, the heart aperture, into the open heart and down, down, down to “the seat of the soul.”
So I can vouch for the fact that the seat of the soul is in the heart. That no longer sounds like a far-fetched notion to me, but something I’ve experienced and realized. (“The Heart is ‘the Seat of the Soul’,” December 17, 2018, at http://goldenageofgaia.com/2018/12/17/the-heart-is-the-seat-of-the-soul/.)
(3) When we were bidding to rent this apartment, unknown to me, the rental agent contacted my old manager. She was a spiteful person and a crook, who cheated me out of my damage deposit (long, uninteresting story). But there would be no way I’d get a good reference from her.
However her husband answered the phone and said she was sick. When asked whether our rental agent could phone his wife tomorrow, was told to FO. When the rental agent told me, I said well, what can I add? I had the place.
So I asked Michael later what he did. He said the man was naturally violent and he just help him along a bit. Michael engineered the moment.