The worst part is that this bombardment can be largely internal. Without glancing at a screen or speaking with someone, our mind continually sifts and sorts through its layers of detritus.
What is my belief system today? What is my heart telling me? How do I know if that really is my heart informing my consciousness at the moment?
Our internal guidance system seems as fallible as weather forecasts. It’ll be sunny and mild tomorrow! Yet the dawn of tomorrow brings rain.
But the forecast said…but I’m sure my heart told me…
And yet here we are, caught out without an umbrella, caught out wondering if we can trust our own intuition. Intuition said to do such and such, and we dutifully obeyed. And then reality gives us the pratfall to end all pratfalls.
*****
I sometimes feel as if human beings are like obsolete computers, given more data to process than our circuit boards were designed to handle. Without a steadfast connection with intuition, our minds have difficulty navigating the basics of day-to-day life at this tumultuous stopping place in history.
Even though at times my body feels more like a prison than a beloved companion, I’ve come to rely on it for my most accurate personal forecast. What am I really feeling? What is really going on? What is truly my best course of action, in the next minute or the next millennium?
My mind is notoriously unreliable in guiding me. Asking my Angels and Guides to manifest my best and highest good with whatever’s happening has become so automatic it can feel inauthentic and rote. I scrabble through the toolbox labeled “things that will help me feel better,” and I’ve been encouraged (or indoctrinated, depending on point of view) to always rely on Spirit first. My perpetually contrary mind wonders, though: is that really Spirit’s guidance on handling the situation? How can I truly know?
Which brings me back to body as my most tangible access to wisdom. My body tells it like it is if I pay even a modicum of attention. Still, it’s hard to appreciate the aches and pains and the exasperating and increasing amount of treatment and prevention my body demands just to walk me through a day. Like a fretful toddler, it always wants more, more, more, even if it can’t tell me exactly what that is.
*****
Since I feel most of my decisions are made following a process like throwing a dart at a spinning dartboard, my real trick is to remember that I truly am where I’m supposed to be, right now. Wherever that dart landed on that movable target, it landed true.
My body sighs and relaxes, and tells me, yes, this is so. And now that you’ve figured that out, let’s go get some lunch.
