A New York psychologist once discussed what he called “reality suction.” What he meant by that is that each of us is trying to suck the other into our own reality.
I have reality suction going on with a young millennial friend whom I’m busily trying to suck into my reality even as she is equally energetically trying to suck me into hers.
Years ago I would have resisted and she probably would have as well. But this time around, I remembered my late brother’s example.
He would never have resisted or criticized another. He accepted all realities and encouraged everyone along the path of their own choosing.
With that in mind, I’m not resisting the reality she wants to suck me into. I’m learning about a few subjects I never thought about before.
I notice that resistance to me has dropped away. As within, so without.
We … OK, I … probably have to learn all over again how to connect and get along with people. So many connections are dissolving over disagreements of conscience right now. Election fraud/no election fraud. Biden/Trump. Vaxxed/Un-vaxxed. Pro-life/Pro-choice. Climate concerned/Not climate concerned. On and on.
This is not dividing us. It’s splintering us. As it was probably designed to do. We’re weak when we’re divided. And that’s the general idea for the ones who are stirring the pot.
Things seemed so beautiful and promising in the Seventies in the growth movement. We were open, transparent, and nourished.
Things are so splintered now that the thought of making the climb to recover and advance in creating social bonds and connections seems overwhelming to me. But that’s what we have to do.
And it won’t come about by resisting each other, but by listening, hearing with compassion, and accepting the other person as they are and for what they are.
We need to bring forward the growth technologies of the Seventies – encounter, psychodrama, bioenergetics, bodywork, rule reconstruction, on and on. We need to push our edge in the area of growth. And keep pushing it.
I can think of a few group leaders I’d like to see come out of retirement to help us.
We need to kickstart our culture.