Remember the Sun

January 1, 2023

I’m finally getting around to transcribing a session I had with Dr. Peebles last January. I started transcribing it a year ago, but wasn’t enamored of the message, so I quit. It’s the first and only time in my more than a dozen sessions with Dr. P that I was thoroughly disenchanted with what Spirit chose to relay.

I now realize my dissatisfaction stemmed from not receiving the answers I wanted about a health issue that hasn’t improved as I’ve been “promised” it would. In fact, it’s gotten worse. (Granted, I haven’t followed through on every single recommendation, but Dr. Peebles always says, If it feels like homework, by all means, ignore it, these are only suggestions.)

Today, it finally occurred to me: if I don’t like the answers, maybe it’s time to ask different questions.

*****

It’s funny, there are some things I’d really like to know, but am hesitant to ask. While I’m about 90% convinced that humanity has been mightily manipulated, repressed, and controlled by dark forces for millennia…do I really want to ask Universe via Dr. Peebles if this is so? Do I want to hear some version of, “Well, perhaps, but remember, it is always your decision to experience what you do in your chosen lifetimes“?

I suspect the answer would be something like that because I’ve asked similar questions and have been told that nothing I’ve experienced has ever been without my “permission.”

This is quite the conundrum. What I hear is: you may not like it, but remember, you elected to be where you are and endure every painful experience you’ve had in order for your soul to advance along its chosen path. 

A part of me inclines its head and humbly agrees, yes, this must be so, that is the way Universe/Spirit works.

But another part has recently become ascendant. It’s the part that says: just one cotton-pickin’ minute. If I keep repeating the same miserable experiences through hundreds or thousands of lifetimes, haven’t I already gleaned every speck of growth from the misery and pain? There must be a saturation point. The elixir of experience flows into the golden chalice of my soul/self/body. When it reaches the rim, surely all it does is overflow and spill into the nothingness of eternity, where it benefits…who?

*****

Instead of getting tied into a knot of resentment and angst, I remind myself to breathe and just sit. I stare out the sliding door, where the wind tosses the avocado tree branches. 

The clouds have obscured the sun, and a gentle mournfulness seeps in. I miss the warmth and the light. 

A tiny shift clicks and I think: but the sun is still there. My inability to see through the clouds does not negate its existence. I can imagine and remember the sun and warmth and light. 

On the thought, the clouds thin and the sky brightens. Coincidence, no doubt. But I smile nonetheless.

Dr. Peebles channeled by Natalie Gianelli, NatalieGianelli.com