Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places

Writer’s Corner

At my request, reader Dr. Karen Hamilton shares with us about unconditional love. From Dec. 5, 2012;

Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places

httpss://ascensionguide.wordpress.com/2012/12/05/looking-for-love-in-all-the-wrong-places/

The first book I remember being exposed to is Are You My Mother.

It tells the story of a small chick who is somehow separated from her mother and travels the world trying to find her. She encounters many other inanimate and animate beings sympathetic to her plight, such as a steam shovel, dog, and others. Despite their empathy, alas, she is told that no, they are not her mother. However, they all pitch in to help, and she is eventually reunited with her mother, having learned and experienced unconditional love along the way.

Karen

What is unconditional love? I always believed it was a love borne from somewhere deep down inside, a place where there was no judgement, criticism, control, or need to feel superior, and contains the qualities of infinite patience, gratitude, generosity, and joy. This is what helps us to “Do unto others as you would have done unto you”. I was taught this from a very early age, having selfless parents who really love their 5 children and did everything they could to make sure we were happy, balanced people.

Because I started out with such a solid foundation, my parents and I believed I was prepared for the world, which I thought would reflect what I had learned from my early years. Sadly, from the age of six, I was confronted with just the opposite in many of the institutions I was exposed to during my (catholic) schooling, and then later in my professional life as a physician.

Even if I was not the one being punished, criticized, or controlled, I witnessed it happening to my fellow students, and later, my patients. It is well known that just witnessing abuse of another can cause distress and symptoms of PTSD, just as if the abuse is happening to you. Victims and witnesses then suffer with episodes of anxiety, depression, lack of self-worth, and even suicidal thoughts which can affect them for the rest of their lives. What mother wishes this for her child?

Like a foul odor seeping into the room, subtle abuse happens invisibly. We are all guilty and have been affected if we have been influenced by or involved in any of the institutions which govern our world today, such as religion, media, healthcare, commerce, military or legal, among many others. That means ALL of us, as there is not a corner of the globe that has not been touched by one or all of the corrupt facets of these systems.

Where and how then do we find unconditional love? First, we must find it in ourselves. It is up to us to forgive ourselves for becoming involved in the abuse cycle, whether we have been the abuser or the abused. Most likely we became unintentionally involved when those with good intentions exposed us to these influences as children. Now these influences have taken over the world and we are about to fall off the “Fiscal Cliff” as a result.

Once self-forgiveness has occurred, you must forgive others, even if they are still caught up in the cycle, and are continuing or even increasing their abuse. Negative energy perpetuates itself easily, but the effects of positive energy are so much greater, as you only need ONE action (random act of kindness) to spread ripples of unconditional love across the earth.

Speaking of the earth, she is also a being, just like us, and she has grieved considerably over our behavior and abuse of each other and her physical body, known as Gaia. However, like the mother who gave us birth, she is but one source of unconditional love. She has given us all we need to survive and thrive, including food, water, shelter, medicine and companions (I love my dog so much).

English: An illustration of the unconditional …

It is now up to us to love each other unconditionally. By doing this we can heal the wounds we have created. Forgive each other for EVERYTHING, starting with debt. Unleash your sense of generosity. When you become aware of someone in need, offer to buy them a meal, or even better buy them a meal anonymously. The policeman who bought the boots for the homeless gentleman was not anonymous, but generous and deserving of all the accolades he got. The homeless gentleman enjoyed the boots, but is still under the influence of abusive systems, so until we fix the fact that he is homeless, a circumstance for which he himself has no explanation, his boots will not really help for long, and in fact he got rid of them because they were a danger to him.

The bottom line is, look for love within yourself. If you can’t find any, go into nature and Gaia will show you some in the sunshine, birds, bees and other animals, water and other elements, etc. etc. etc. Then come back into your family and share what you have found with the people you love. Remember that your family will not be around forever; think how you would feel if this was the day that your spouse lost their life in a car accident, and you had spent the morning arguing about some trivial matter.

Then be generous to yourself and someone else. If you are a landlord and have an extra place to live, consider donating shelter to someone who needs it. Go through your storage shed and donate your unneeded clutter to the local thrift store or shelter. If you have health insurance and have not needed to use your benefits this year, find out how you can donate what you don’t use to someone else who is in need of health care. Give someone a ride who can’t afford transportation. Pay for someone’s cell phone. Brainstorm and you will come up with great ideas that are unique to you, your situation, and those you come across.

Start being the change that we need to save each other from what we have created. Just one Act of Random Kindness can put us all on the ARK of unconditional love.

A friend is someone who can see the truth and …