It is a worthy idea for you to desire peace and leave happiness to arrive on its own accord. That is, without effort, or great effort. Have I suggested this to you before?
With effort, you may struggle to unstring yourself and unbind happiness from a net you might have cast to imprison it?
You could be so intent on being happy that it is as though happiness is a debt owed to you, so much so that you perhaps scare off happiness, as though happiness becomes an assignment, something obligatory, and perhaps you resent Life that let you down, and/or you are dissatisfied with yourself for not achieving a desired result.
When you try to force happiness, you are also forcing yourself. I don’t think happiness has the capability to come to you by force. If, by deserving happiness, you mean that happiness HAS to come and stay with you, you are detaching yourself from happiness. No matter how worthy you are, happiness does not owe you a red cent. Happiness cannot be squeezed or blackmailed or extorted from life for you. Happiness chooses to come to you, and you are to choose it.
It would seem that happiness is not something achieved. Happiness and its counterpart, unhappiness, are on a scale, and it’s unlikely you are to associate your value according to how you rate on your happiness scale. When Life rewards you, you are happy. When Life doesn’t reward you as you wish it would, you may feel that Life is punishing you, and you become unhappy and sad and full of disappointment.
Your desire for happiness may become something like desiring to lose weight. You go on a full-fledged diet in order to lose weight. This very desire may become less a desire than a determination to succeed. Instead of the word determination, we could substitute the words — your will. It is your will to succeed. When it comes to dieting and perhaps comes to happiness, you may waver. Your goal may escape you, and you don’t follow your own diet.
Better to let the arousal of happiness be a surprise to you. Let happiness fly to you. When you anticipate happiness, it is easy to expect it, demand it, insist on it, and thus push away the very happiness you so desire. Everyone has heard the expression: “You’re trying too hard.” When you try too hard, you may deflate and defeat happiness and gain unhappiness instead.
Bringing happiness to your side – inviting it, welcoming it, encouraging it, intending it, admiring it, loving the idea — is one thing. Ordering it as a sergeant in the Marines might by yelling at happiness, barking at it, not being able to live without red-hot happiness is quite another story.
Allow happiness to be a guest that you are delighted to have visit you. As soon as you command happiness to come and to stay, it eludes you. Allow happiness to come on its own steam. Welcome happiness every time it visits. Happiness is not a debtor. Be a gracious host. What else can you do? You most certainly can’t keep happiness a prisoner.
You may be resisting happiness. Let go of resistance to happiness. On the other hand, don’t hold on too tightly to happiness. Happiness doesn’t want to be lassoed and sequestered anymore than you do.
Let happiness give its own full range of giving to you.