This is truly troubling. I live in the state of New York and I hear stories from mommy groups I’ve been a part of that had direct experience with CPS on some level. It seems when you need CPS to do their job, they don’t because there’s bureaucracy and red tape to circumnavigate, so there is no real protection granted. On the other hand, across the country, CPS is now taking on the role of judge, jury, and executor to dictate how parents are required to parent in these modern times.
Case in point, this family in Maryland has had two run ins with CPS involving them letting their children aged 6 and 10 walk home alone from a park a couple blocks away from their home. The parents told the kids they were allowed to play for 2 hours and then they had to come home. So, the children did exactly that. On their way home however, a police officer coerced them into his patrol car telling them he would drive them home. Instead, he held them without notifying the parents for hours.
The kids knew their phone number and address, but were held without knowing what was going on for hours. When the time came for their children to be home, the parents got worried and called the police. Instead of the police telling them what was going on, they had to wait for a return call by CPS. They missed dinner. They missed bedtime. The police officer that detained the children finally offered to share his lunch when the children complained about being hungry, but stopped when the older child informed the police officer his sister had food allergies.
To me, it sounds like these children are exercising and practicing their growth to becoming responsible young adults. They were heading home when they were told to and they looked out for each other while in police custody. Would I have done the same thing? I don’t know. I don’t know all the details, what I do know is the police department manipulated their power by lying to the children about taking them home then holding them for HOURS before their parents got in contact with someone who knew what was going on. It’s a total abuse of power.
We are living in a time where police states are being exercised the lust for power over the common man or woman is terrifying. With all of the bad publicity police departments are getting in the south over what happened in Ferguson and South Carolina… you’d think they’d be especially vigilant across the nation to show the public they really are here to defend and protect us instead of bullying and harassing.
There is not a proper check and balance in place when it comes to law enforcement. How often do we hear victims of stalking losing their lives because the police department’s “hands are tied” until a crime is committed, or cyber bullying that leads to suicides, or CPS cases where there is known abuse and evidence but that agency doesn’t do a thing until they are dealing with a homicide. It doesn’t make any sense. In this case, the children were not in danger.
The office claims he saw a homeless man eyeing the children, that’s why he did it. Well, where’s the proof? Did he detain the children and then detain the homeless man? There was no crime committed so they couldn’t detain this homeless man. They could however detain the children. Why is this allowed? It’s an outrage. If there was a threat to their safety any respectable officer would have taken the children home like he said he would and then alert the parents of the situation he averted. None of this happened.
I also suspect this pervy homeless man was imaginary so the police officer could say he did it for a “valid reason”.
I have nothing against law enforcement. They do have their place in our communities. What I do have a problem with is when the police butts in on someone’s parenting. Parents know their children. A parent will know if a child is responsible enough to walk a couple blocks (or even a mile…) to learn independence and grow into who they are. Sure, there are neglectful parents who just don’t care what their kids do. I won’t rule that out. What I will say though, is if there is neglect due to a child walking home from the park without adult supervision it has to be proven just like anything else.
The police should not have the right to just pick our children up off the street and lie to them. That’s going to cause a distrust for authority from the time they are children. That will teach them that the police cannot be trusted. I’m sure if these children encounter a problem where they may need an officer’s assistance, they may think twice now. What will happen to their parents if they get the police involved? It’s really a violation of parental rights to intervene like this without being asked.
Again, I just want to make it clear that had there been an actual incident or the children absolutely needed to be detained, there needs to be proof and the parents need to be notified immediately. In the cases where the children are too young to know their phone numbers that’s one thing, but these two kids knew their home address, parent’s names, and phone number. There is no reason this should have played out like this.
As far as the psychologist who wonders if the parents were just trying to “prove a point” because they knew CPS was watching them…that’s ridiculous. Does the psychologist understand that she is supporting a fear mentality or is that how she treats her patients? Do what is “right” because you are being watched. What if you disagree, as these parents do? That automatically means you are setting yourself up to be a martyr? No, you are within your rights to use your parental discretion to allow your children to grow into young adults and productive members of society.
We all can’t fit into this box of regulation. We can’t. Some can, some can’t, some will, some won’t. We need to be able to exercise our free will on this planet. Using the fear induction to scare us into helicopter parenting is not right.
When I was a kid, my brother and I stayed home by ourselves in the summers while my mother worked from the time we were 9 and 10 years old. My mom would go to work at 7am and be home around 330pm. We knew how to make breakfast and lunches for ourselves, we would walk across town to play at the playground with our friends, or we’d just go over to our friends’ houses to play. I had a single mother, I had a responsible brother, and I was responsible at a young age as well. We didn’t even have cell phones then!
We are running into issues with parenting now because the way we were raised is now basically illegal. There are no official laws, but apparently our parenting styles are being policed. Does this mean since I grew up fiercely independent at a young age my mother should have been arrested? I joined the military out of high school and supported myself and made my own decisions on how I wanted my life to be and was ready for it by the time I graduated high school.
Are we really fostering a parenting style that will create our children to not be confident in themselves, able to make decisions on their own, and hold no real responsibilities because it’s “safer”? What are we truly willing to give up for feeling safe? We need to understand that there is no reason for fear. If you don’t vibe with fear inducing situations, you can’t draw it to you. If you constantly fret about what could go wrong, something probably will. Your experience is what your consciousness projects. I wish more people questioned these controls that are being forced onto us.
We all need to get to a point as a society of sovereign individuals, where we take back our own personal power. We should be able to parent our children based upon the child and parent and our own circumstances. The way I parent will be different than how someone else does and as long as there is a healthy loving relationship present, that should be fine. I don’t see why children being children and enjoying their childhood is becoming a criminal matter.
Aren’t we supposed to be raising our children so that when they are ready we can watch them spread their wings and fly? They’ll never be able to fly if we keep clipping their wings. Shouldn’t we, as parents, know when it’s time to give them some room to grow, make mistakes, and maybe get hurt every once in a while in the process? This should not be up to CPS or the police to detain our children without telling us so that we think twice about letting our children grow up.
We are far greater beings than we have been told, far greater beings than most of us realize.
In Light and Love,