I’m going through a tremendous battle over here that showed up even in my dreams last night.
I’ve just finished the first draft of Building Nova Earth.
Until this time I’ve never charged for anything I’ve written. But now the need to provide for the team’s well-being is such that I’ve agreed with myself to write books for which there’ll be a charge.
My teacher (Ammachi) told me perhaps 20 years ago that I would not incur karma for my writing as long as I didn’t charge for it. I’d resisted for many years prior to that and all the years after any invitations to publish for profit anyways. But her advice firmed up my resolve.
People have offered to publish New Maps of Heaven for profit and I’ve said no. It needed to remain free on the Internet. The same with From Darkness Unto Light and First Contact. And I’ve always been happy with that decision.
I asked Archangel Michael, in a personal reading yesterday, about how to sell it. He suggested selling it as an e-book through Amazon at $10 and as a hardcover for $20. There will be other books coming as well, on NESARA, the galactics, etc.
I didn’t really ask him what he felt about the idea overall because I’m committed to going ahead with it so I’d already made up my mind. And I know he won’t interfere with our free will.
I intend to send it free to those who cannot afford it and let us know by way of “Contact Us.” I can’t see what purpose is served by denying information to those who haven’t money.
The dilemma was crystalized in a dream I had last night. I was travelling through the southwestern United States meeting lightworkers.
The topic of conversation was crystals. Many lightworkers were wearing around their necks very large pink tetrahedronal crystals and I was being advised to get one at a local store for such-and-such a reason. They were very reasonably priced.
To warm me up to the idea, I was encouraged to watch a video of a well-known lightworker who was dressed rather outlandishly with a very large crystal round his neck. He was giving a very animated talk in a highly decorated set but the inner aim of the talk was to make money.
I’m not sure why it is this way for me but I felt nauseous and had to turn the video off.
Archangel Michael in the reading I had on Feb. 7th emphasized with me again the need to keep the rigorous independence of the blog and said I would see the reason for that over time.
But there isn’t only the need to maintain independence externally. There’s also the need to maintain independent internally and beginning to charge for writings can, I fear, create a very delicate but nonetheless powerful reorientation inside that I’ve been unwilling to risk till now.
One can end up writing for one’s “market.” One can end up not saying what should be said or saying something only for advantage. One can lose one’s courage. I’ve fought against that for most of my life.
An insidious thing about awareness is that it can subside and one may never know it has done so. Awareness drops in the face of muscular tension. But it can also fall in the face of qualities like greed, ambition, and worldly desire.
A fuller awareness is won not only through greater relaxation of stress but also through manifesting the divine qualities more and more in one’s life. If one invites the mundane qualities in like greed, ambition, and desire, awareness can plummet. And one doesn’t know that one doesn’t know.
So I’m definitely going through a struggle over here and taking this step isn’t one I take lightly.
As soon as NESARA comes in or any other source of relief, that’s the end of this experiment. And, because I don’t want to court losing awareness over it, I’ll be relieved to see it end.