Ben Arion started the Ashtar Command blogsite. I’d always suspected he’d had an enlightenment experience. Here he describes one such experience within the context of our common Ascension and the dark nights of the soul they can include.
The Void of Transformation and Letting Go
Ben-Arion, Ashtar Command, Aug. 14, 2011
http://www.ashtarcommandcrew.net/forum/topics/the-void-of-transformation-and-letting-go-by-ben-arion
Life is constant motion and there will always be changes in the physical. We cannot limit the love in our lives. Life will show us where to go and it may feel as if it is a “dense” and rough way to follow. Beliefs and patterns are coming to the surface to be released. I’ve experienced this myself recently.
The Drama is increasing in people’s lives and every fear has to be felt. We have many names for this. We can call it awakening to Love. The “shadow” of yourself will knock at the door because it wants to be loved and seen. The Ego will react in many different ways. It’s like dying but it’s only your beliefs that are changing and transforming into a higher vibration or understanding. Your Ego feels threatened because it cannot relate to the energy of “not knowing” of whats coming.
The Ego wants things to be as they have been. It cannot understand that something better can come from a shift like this. Your Ego is like a little child. Don’t take it personally. The only thing you can do when the “storm” catches you is to breathe, walk in nature, ground yourself, be still and Trust. It’s like life gently “forces” you to be in your heart because the heart is beyond duality and knows beyond knowing.
Surrender To “What Is”
You’ll feel like your heart is melting and you surrender to “what is” and in this energy you will be a conduit for higher energies, which will embrace you like a little child. If you want to be seen in the world and need attention, you should see and attend to yourself first. We all want to be loved for who we are, but do you love yourself for who you are?
Life will not always give you what you want, but always what you need to Awaken from your slumber into love, which is worth more than “physical” wanting. Our heart or soul is waking us up gently, one step at a time, because it knows what we are capable of. The Ego will be shocked but the heart will know. You don’t have to know everything. You’ll notice that the “not knowing” will be like a “long lost friend” that will make you step into the Void of the Now moment.
Your beliefs are just beliefs and they will be “crushed” into little pieces because everything you believe will be turned upside down and twisted 360 degrees. The heart doesn’t depend on beliefs. The Heart is LIFE in itself embracing the moment of now. LIFE does not want you to suffer. It has a reason and it will show you things you couldn’t see, because of your Ego. Yes, you’ll feel alone, but it’s a part of the process. You have to go through the Void of Emptiness all by “yourself”. This is where we’ll be with GOD or our higher self, we have to start loving ourself exactly the way we are and let go of everything. In the void you’ll understand that you are never alone and that Love is within you.
Your Ego will not disappear. You cannot get rid of it. But your heart will fall in love with your ego and they will merge into a balanced companionship, like friends holding each others hands.
My mind felt good in what “was” and was satisfied with that, but the heart felt otherwise and wanted me to meet my fears upfront and so I did. It felt like a huge separation and I will always remember what I went through. I would absolutely call it a process. My mind didn’t like it and wanted to find a solution to “make it all good again”, as we say.
My heart “forced” me gently to go within all of these feelings of abandonment and fears of losing something, and I did feel a lot of things for many days. Actually I’ve never felt so much in my whole life because I stood face to face with my worst fears. I’ve cried and I’ve felt powerless. I knew that I’d chosen this, but saying this to yourself when you are facing your fears isn’t as easy as it sounds. You can just “surrender” to your heart, which I did many times. The Ascension of the heart into Love isnit always what you’d expect it to be. I knew I had patterns and beliefs that had to be “lightened up”.
Falling In Love
It felt as if I was hanging on the edge of a cliff and someone said to me “I want to help you” and then stepped on my hands so I loosened my hold on the edge. I fell and fell and the acceleration was enormous. It was as if a year of emotional processing flew by in a few days. I also felt that I didn’t “hit” the ground and that I never would because the love would always be there. It was like “falling” in love without fear of losing something or someone.
We have everything we search for within us.
Why do I share this with all of you? Because it wasnt a “fun” thing I felt. It felt very lonely. In this moment of writing this I feel a lot better and I’m happy to be in the moment. I feel connected and disconnected in waves. You’re always connected, but your body has a life of its own, with all its memories. I’ve got so much support around me. I’m always cared for and it has helped me alot. I have people in my life that I’ve always known and will know forever. I love them so much.
Life cannot be planned too much in these new energies, because moments are fluid and in constant change. I had to embrace the unknown and you’ll also meet the fears you feel within you and discover that it is a “path” to understand the light that you really are. People call it the “dark night of the soul”. I call it “the Awakening of the soul.”
I think its important to share this because it isn’t just me going through this but every human on this planet going through this shift. It may feel good if you know that you aren’t alone in the process.
Love does not come from someone else, but it can be shared with others. Relationships will play a big role in the awakening to love. Things you didn’t dare to look at before will “pop up” in front of you and you’ll feel separated. Fear will arise. Fear isn’t to be feared. Its a powerful wave, like a tsunami washing through your body, which will release the density in your body. I resisted the fear for a little while, but there came a moment where I had to let go because i knew it was the only way to go. My heart and soul knows this. I feel different than before but I cannot “name” what’s different.
Feeling safe in a relationship because you know that you have each other and maybe that you “own” each other. You may create “silent” contracts between each other around how the future will be, how everything will go according to certain plans, etc. This is the time when relationships will bring “EVERYTHING” to the surface. That may seem like chaos but it’ll bring forth the love within and make you remember that you are the love, not someone out there.
You often give love because you feel that you don’t have it, but you’ll realize that love isn’t given from anything. It is who you are.
All the safety in your lives may come to a point where you think everything is going to “die”, but its the death of the Ego. Love always wants you to evolve through the heart.
The old cannot be brought into the new, thats why you face situations where you have no other choice than to let go and start to TRUST the process.
Embracing Your Fears
There is no certain way to embrace your fears. You have to really be in that fear and it will fill every cell of your body. You will believe it’s real at times. It may feel really painful to feel all of these things. There will come a point where your heart says to you “LET GO AND BE IN THE MOMENT and I will guide you.” Your fears will shed a greater light on situations. You will look at things differently, but people will see you as you always were. You will take things more lightly and not be afraid of being who you are. A sense of peace will grow within because all the fear you felt and went through will make you stronger and you’ll understand that within all these fears was a greater purpose, which was to know your heart more fully.
It isn’t easy to say this when you are in the process. I for example just took long walks, took much time for myself, doing nothing. I didn’t “think” my way through this “fear”, I was totally in it and I couldn’t escape from it. It was really painfulland my mind went crazy. So don’t think you’re crazy or not spiritual because everything is “tough”. Life isn’t always a “pink cloud experience”.
As I read a while ago, we’re moving into a new lifetime without leaving our bodies. We’ll leave the “play” of karma. To leave the play of karma, we experience all of these things at the bottom of the bag and we also get rid of the “old” beliefs that are holding us back from creating our heart’s desires. I feel I have some patterns left in my body and mind that cannot or will change, because they are a part of my “life-blueprint”. There is no right or wrong way in this awakening. I’m just sharing my experience of it. To follow your heart isn’t always easy. I feel like time as I knew it has changed. I cannot live in the future anymore. I’m always “guided” to be in the moment more and more. It feels good. No one can resist the power of love and its light.
It’s like my heart is telling me that I can create whatever I want and always wished for in this eternal moment. It’s like my Ego believed certain things it wanted, which wasn’t really important. All things are being stripped to their core and my “heart’s desires” can blossom. It also feels like things are repeating themselves in cycles and I’ve always known about these things, but it feels more real now. It’s like a “click” in your heart, beyond logic.
I don’t work anymore. I’m playing with my life experience. Life doesn’t have to work; life is. Who I think I am isn’t a name or a personality. It’s an energy that’s moving through me, which is eternal and a part of everything, everywhere. Love does not struggle to survive; love is. The only thing that’s trying to survive is the little “me”. The “me” is becoming the Energy of “I AM THAT I AM”. I am you and you are another me. We all touch each other in multidimensionality and everything is connected. As Jesus said: “Love can move mountains”.
Life will continue and my thoughts will continue. Fears will still be there but in the “comfort” of My loving heart. Changes are constant. Learn to ride the waves of life by being in the moment and trusting the process. I know things will be played to their edges and things will fall over the cliff, where they will transform into love.
I feel very empty at the moment but I feel a lot of love too, which doesn’t involve any kind of action or “have to”. The love is simply there and all things are ok as they are.
Love <3
Ben-Arion
